Daily Plate: Weird Kitchen Gadgets

For better or for worse, I seem to have inherited a love of kitchen gadgetry from my mother or whomever is responsible for the kitchen-crap gene on that side of the family. Yogurt makers, bread makers, standing mixers—I have tried them all and can’t wait until I one day have a kitchen large enough to stow all that stuff. This is, of course, assuming I make enough money to both buy the aforementioned culinary paraphernalia and an apartment/house big enough to house this dream kitchen.

I remember Chris got a little freaked the day I brought home a blender last summer, but he soon made friends with it, and can now speak its language better than I can. And when I got a Williams Sonoma giftcard for Christmas? He was all over that—I’m not sure which of us was more excited about the mini-food processor, but I somehow suspect that if we ever parted ways, he’d request custody of it.  I’d take the Pyrex roasting dish.

For every kitchen gadget I either own and use every day or hope to one day own and use every day, there is an oddity bestowed upon me by a well-meaning relative who had no idea what else to get me for Christmas. Take, for example, the 4”  x 6” cutting board (perfect for when I decide to take up camping and want to pack light?) or this weird little blue-person pastry brush.  I hardly ever use it—it just kind of hangs out on the counter. If you look at it too long, it’s a bit creepy. It has no eyes yet possesses a very defined belly button and butt-crack. Perfect for, um, glazing the buns I make in my invisible bread maker?

I’ll take it over a souvenir bottle of, say, mountain air, though. At least these things however bizarre they may be, serve a purpose.